Tuesday, 17 September 2013

Have what you want

Here's the best advice I have to give to anyone. Have the things you want. Buy the things that make you happy. Don't wait to be given them and don't ever expect anyone else to buy them for you. If you want it, work hard and buy it.
I gave this advice to a young friend of mine recently after a trip to Chanel, as we walked away she complained that she would never be able to afford to shop their and I explained that if she wants to shop in Chanel she can, that it will be up to her to decide on that.
I openly admit I have shoes, bags, jewels and a wardrobe that is the envy of many others. But I don't own my own home. I don't drive a fancy car and that doesn't matter to me. My library is vast, my mind constantly stimulated by new ideas, writers, words and images, because that matters to me.
If you simply want what other people have you will never be happy because there is no end to envy. But if you have what you want, or are working at getting what you want you will achieve happiness.
All too often we are told what we should want (and equally what we shouldn't) and often people are accused of superficiality because of the things they desire. But if those things make a person happy, what is wrong with that? Especially when a person has worked for it, not expected a handout or a free ride to get it.
There are many people in this world who have a lot more than me and I don't mind a bit. In most of those cases they have worked hard for it or are working hard to get it. I know what I want for me and I am working to get it and, I don't let others make me feel bad about it.
We are encouraged to be individuals, to express ourselves but, when we do we are open to criticism for it. Equally, as women we are encouraged to earn our own money, be independent and work hard for the money but then others (other women included) criticise us for how we spend the money we earn. 
We need to stop judging and be more supportive and less critical. Who has the right to dictate how others should spend their money? I will never let anyone tell me how to spend my money and I will never expect anyone else to pay for me.

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